Yesterday was a pout day. I have been having a tough time at work lately, as I am a victim of the standard company policy, 'do more with less'. Well, it is catching up with me. I don't have any more to give at the moment, so I am feeling pretty sorry for myself.
Second, I have been searching for other job opportunities. I had a really strong interview this week, and I was almost certain that I was going to get the job. Well, I got the 'thanks but no thanks' call in the middle of the crap day at work. This just put me over the edge. Not only does work suck, but I am stuck there.
My first inclination was to raid the vending machine. I held back, but I felt my face turn absolutely red. My emotions were getting the best of me. I can't work at all when I get like this. I was just too overwhelmed. So, I packed up my gear and called it a day. Did I leave early? NO.
I get to my car and I left the friggin' lights on. Battery DEAD. In the interest of full disclosure, I just did this 2 weeks ago too. Where is my mind? Called AAA, got a jump, and was home about an hour later than I planned.
Sweetheart greeted me at the door with a big hug. I stripped myself of the zoot suit and climbed into bed for a cuddle. This helped somewhat, but my energy was really drained. So, I skipped the gym and went to bed. (Damn, I promised myself no 0 PA days).
So, today is a new day. I am going to try my best not to get down. While I didn't get the job, I got some good feedback about why. It turns out that they want me to get more education on a few subjects. I have to chew on this. I love learning, but hate school (if that makes sense). Plus, school is costly. But, if I want out, then I have to do what I have to do.
Well, happy eating-exercising and all that jazz for today. In the NE, it is supposed to be pretty. Get outside.
I am 36 and have been overweight for most of my life. There are much better things that define me, but till I work on this weight, it is the stinky fart in the room. So, I write this to keep accountable, to find inspiration in others, to rekindle the joy in myself.