OK, so I am currently on the sauce. This means I had a few. I threw a few back. I am schnackered. But come on... it is World Cup people!! I just spent a bit over 90 minutes with hundreds of Ex-pat US and England fans, watching on double screens, drinking what is called a tower... Yes, a tower of Tiger beer with my pal Dave. It was fantastic. In case you don't follow the news, England and the US won 1-nil!!! That puts the US in first place in division C. I enjoyed telling that repeatedly to Dave, as he bleeds red and white....
Here in Singapore, the next games play at 2:30 in the morning, so I am not going to make it to find out whether Ghana or Germany take it. However, I will be really curious when I wake, as it will determine who plays who in the next round. My bets are that Germany takes it and the next game is
US v. Germany... but we shall see!!
So this is my life-balance post for today... I drank beer. I even had some wings (no sauce), and a cheeseburger from McD's. I never go there, but in Singapore, believe it or not... the burgers are
fan-flippin'-tastic. As well, I also ran a 5k this morning on the treadmill, because I CAN!!!
For those of you who are struggling through a rough patch.... I am here for you.. You can make it through. I weigh over 200 pounds and I run and I HAVE FUN! Put that in your pipe and smoke it!!
OK, off to bed before I make a mess of it. Cheers!
Greetings from Singapore.. Yup, on a two-week jaunt for work. I spent all of last week getting all anxious about the trip, eating my feelings and being pissy about it. So, here I am, a week on from my last post and 1.5 lbs heavier for the week. Thank God I pay a personal trainer, because if I didn't, I most certainly would not have worked out last week at all.
Now that I am here, I feel fine. It is funny how that works out. All the build up for a big nothing. I even woke at a reasonable time this morning, had a healthy breakfast, and worked out at the hotel gym (which is very, very nice). So, I am back on the wagon people. Sorry for being MIA.
I did and completed, (focus on completed), my first SPIN class. I have been secretly plotting to do it for a while. I tried to do one a couple years ago, but I never had the stamina. I always whinged through the ass pain as I could never get the seat right. I always had a reason to quit. I considered my previous attempt to be a real failure, source of embarrassment, and I just needed to overcome it. Even if I got through the class just once, hated it, and never did it again, I needed to know that I could do it. I needed to validate what I kind of already knew: That I am stronger than I was before.
Well, I did it! And.... I really enjoyed it. The instructor was a bit intimidating: she was like a walking muscle with lungs. However, I liked the music (who wouldn't like climbing a hill to Led Zeppelin?), and I felt like I could set a pace for myself and not overdo it too soon. It helped that I have been using a heart rate monitor for a while, and know what my levels are.
This all being said, the true test is tomorrow morning, when I wake up and hopefully can move :-)
Now onto my food fail. Up to this point, I have made yummy, edible food. Today, was NOT that day. I have been reading about the use of chocolate as a spice in food. There are lots of health benefits to chocolate, not to mention: 'everything tastes better with chocolate!' WRONG.. Oh so wrong. I added cocoa powder to my veggie and tomato concoction. It was so bitter. Ick. I should have dumped it, but food-guilt me, cleared my plate, bite by nasty bite. I'm a little mad at myself for feeling guilt about food waste: what am I 8 years old!?! So lame of me.
I haven't given up yet on chocolate in cooking, but I think I need a recovery break. Complete Food Fail.
I haven't written much about the things I want to try. I find it funny that I have had this spin goal for years, and never mentioned it. I also have been dying for a while to try chocolate in my cooking, but didn't say a word. What do they have in common: fear of failure. So, I am going to, in future posts, start listing some of the things I would like to try, and goals I would like to aspire. Getting them out there makes them real and if I make it or break it, great. At least by putting it out there, fear of failure doesn't prevent me from putting skin in the game.
Today is a great day. Today I am officially 49.9 lbs lighter. I find today to be a big victory because it is like most things: it can't just be a round, perfect number. It can't be a full 50, a full milestone.
In this scenario, I have two choices.
The old me would say.. WHAT THE @#$%?!? 49.9 is not good enough. I have failed, even in my losses!
The new me says: WOOOOOOOT! I have a win! An, imperfect, odd, almost, kinda number. It suits me perfectly.
So, this Monday is a celebration to the almost-perfect, almost-awesome, second-guessed wins that all of you may be happening to have today. I say celebrate the heck out of them! 'Cause when the big-perfection one finally comes along, I, and hopefully you, will go BALLS OUT!
Here is to a strong week people & tell me about your almost-perfect win for the day! I know you got 'em!
In a week's time, I will be on the road again for work for a whole two weeks!! UGH!!
All of my weight disasters have circled the drain around travel, and principally work travel.
Big work dinners.
Working way later than normal.
Lack of Sleep. (12 hour time difference this time)
Missing the Gym.
All of these things are a prescription for disaster, but here is my plea.
I want to make this better this time, and I need your help.
What hotel workouts do you do? This trip, I will have a gym available to me 24 hours a day, and a pool!!
The gym is somewhat small, but has treadmills, elliptical, and free weights.
On a high note, I will get to see these flowers again. Does anyone remember where? :-)
Well, my life of an athlete is kickin' into high gear! I am injured. Boo!
I think my new sneakers have triggered a pain pattern of tightness from my ankle, through my calf, and shooting into the back of my knee.
Sweetheart rubbed it a bit, and that provided some relief. But now that he stopped, I feel the tightness happening all over again. It is like I have tight guitar strings on the back of my left leg. If I move to much to the right or left, they might *Snap*.
I was super tired yesterday, so I didn't gym it. I don't want to miss another day. I need some fitness. Give me my fitness!! AARRGH!
I am going to give it a few hours and then we will just have to see. Maybe swimming would take the edge off it?
On Wednesday, one of my mentors from work pulled me aside and told me that they resigned. I did not expect it, but suspected that something was going to change. Let me explain.
In the past several years, I have had many opportunities provided to me to improve my skills, to advance in the company, to do new things. In the last year or so, I moved to a position where I worked along with and above my mentors and spent significant time with the stakeholders within my company. From this vantage point, I got to see my mentors in a new way. In some cases, they were the leaders that I always thought they would be. In others, I found that, like the mirrors, 'images maybe closer than they appear'.
I saw when mistakes were being made. Like a devoted lamb, I warned. I gave opinions of caution, suggestions of redirection. I was ignored. At the time, I felt dismissed and unaccepted. Now, I know that I was right. However, here I am, correct, vindicated in my convictions, and I still feel like shit. Did I stutter? Did I not say the right words? Had my mentor taken my advice, they would not be resigning. I find myself mourning the mentor relationship, not because I couldn't learn more, but because my mentor couldn't learn the lessons that they taught me, from me.
So my last lesson from my mentor: Listen to the mentee. If you teach them well, they might actually have something to teach you.
How does this relate to the health journey? Not all the experts make all the best decisions. Sometimes the ones who are the students, the practitioners, have the best advice. I have learned so much from all of you, just because I know that you have practiced what you preached. You pay attention. You are honest when something goes bust. You can take it when 'anonymous' comments with livid harshness. You are all my mentors. I look forward to tomorrow's lesson.
I have not been able to make my mid-week check-in call with HMR for the last couple of weeks, thanks to my vacation. While I was out, I noticed that my group has drastically decreased in size. We used to be 10-12 people strong, and now there are only 5. I worry that people are taking a health vacation. Is there a season for health that I was missing? Is being on a program a seasonal activity? I've been looking online to see if there are any statistics, but the only thing I saw was a vague reference to Jenny Craig and the average membership was 16 weeks.
So, supposing it is 16 weeks, and most people start at the beginning of the year with their New Year's resolutions, then they would be on health vacation starting Mid-April. However, I am going to juxtapose that people take mini-vacations during this 16 week period. People take a week for Valentine's, then spring break in March, then another week for Easter-Passover holidays. This puts us well into May, so I guess I should not be surprised that June seems like a ghost town.
Have you noticed the same behaviors in your local support groups? I have even noticed some of the same behaviors in many of the blogs I follow. I have noticed fewer postings (myself included), and also blogs just disappearing into thin air. So, here is what I suppose people:
SCHOOL IS NOT OUT. Health doesn't get a vacation. Put down that cupcake. Go outside for a walk. I am on the hook and SO ARE YOU!
On a side note, my new sneakers are making my knees hurt :-( but I am not giving up. I am going to continue to train with them for a week or so and see if it normalizes. I guess my knees just like it when I roll my ankles, and now that I can't: OUCH!
I am new to this whole athlete thing. I do not have all the gadgets and gear. Most importantly, I did not have the right sneakers. I have known this for a little while. I have noticed that after my runs, by knees felt tight and sore. My hips were out of whack. I knew this had to be shoe related. (It also could be because I have a big ass, but I am sticking to the shoes).
So, yesterday, I went to a sneaker specialty store. I thought the process would only take 20 minutes, so I drove over before my planned workout. Boy, was I wrong. 90 minutes later, and close to $200 bucks, I walked out with moon boots, anti-microbial socks, and new insoles for my kicks. Let's explain the process.
I walk in, and they first measure my feet. Then, they have me stand on a computer scanner and they measured my arch and my gait. Apparently I have a better arch than I thought. I always considered myself to have flat feet. Apparently, I have a 'flexible arch'. So you think I am finished, nope.
Then, they have me run on a treadmill, barefoot. They take a video of each of my feet, while I run. It shows in slow-mo, that I roll my ankles, where they should be straight. In the end, they recommend a mobility stabilizing shoe. Now, this sounded OK, except all the options in this category are weird looking. They all have extra thick bottoms, are generally flat, and kinda ugly. However, I am really hoping that my knees feel better, so I am up for the challenge. So, this is what I bought:
I am hoping I didn't get taken for a ride. However, I do like this RoadRunner Sports. I can try them for up to 60 days. If I hate them, I can return them covered in mud. I appreciate that. The bad news is I missed my workout to buy these shoes. It just took too long and I could not squeeze it all in. So today is the day that I get my test drive on my gear. Wish me luck!
Today was the Reckoning. Did Missa gain 60 lbs while on vacation? Did she plump like a blueberry? NOOOO! She didn't! Actually, I feel really good, relaxed and healthy. I did have a minor gain .4 lbs, but I am PMS'ing, so I really think it is a wash. Most importantly, I feel great that I was able to enjoy myself and not over-indulge all by myself. I didn't bring a scrap of HMR food with me. I just used my mind to make good choices. I can't tell you what a win that is. I have been on vacations before where a 15lb gain was par for the course.
In celebration, I am going to post a picture of me and my Sweetheart. (OK girls, don't swoon.) He said it was OK to reveal his true self on this blog, and well, him in his hat (which he adores) and tie-dyed bathing trunks is as close to his true self in a photo as you can get! He would like to point out that the cap is a Trilby and not a Fedora. (this might give you further insight). Oh, and I am comfortable in a bathing suit! Win! (Where the hell did that come from?) I got it at Target (pronounced Tar-gzhay). It comes with straps and looks great with or without them.
So now for something completely different: Trainers. Also known as sneakers, athletic shoes, etc. I need a pair and now that I run, I need to have a really good pair. At the moment, my Adidas are doing me justice, but they are getting a bit thin at the treads. So, I am going to go to a store today called RoadRunner Sports. Here, they can test your arch and make a real recommendation on what I should be using. Any suggestions on brands or this footwear procurement experience is totally appreciated.
To this end, I also decided to change something else on my dailymile account. When I started, I classified myself as a Walker. Well, now, I do more fitness training and running. So, my new title: ATHLETE. With this comes a new goal: to kick ass. Seriously. I want to be fit not to be thin, but to do things that others can't. I am tired of being limited. I want to make some noise.
I hope this Monday is the start of a strong week. Cheers!
I went to the largest cruise ship in the world: The Oasis of the Seas. I have cruised many times before over the years. Nothing was like this boat.
1. It is massive
2. Although you are with 5500 passengers, you don't notice them because the boat is huge.
3. GREAT Gym.
4. Healthy Dining Options EVERYWHERE!
5. Lots of fun stuff (I played in a dodgeball tournament!)
So, speaking of healthy? How did I do? Well, I have decided not to weigh myself till Monday, my usual day. I did eat some heavier, more decadent food than I typically do and my portion sizes were 'full'. I also had some cocktails, but hey, it is vacation!!
However, I kept up on my fitness. I was worried that I would go to the gym the first day and then never see it again, but no!!! I got in there and got it done. In fact, it kind of made me laugh to watch all the gym-hard's stare at the fat girl running miles on the treadmill and pumping iron. I can't blame them though. People watching is the best thing ever on a cruise ship. You see people doing things you would never have thought possible.
So, here are some photos from the trip. I am doing the Biggest Loser Challenge with Katy over at Project-Look Good Naked but it just started on the 1st, while I was away from Blogger land... One of the requirements is that I needed to provide starting photos. Well, here they are! The pooches and me were taken on May 28th, the photo of me in the blue dress was on May 30th, the one of me snoozin' in the Cabana was June 1 and so was the one of me smilin' in the disco!
So, today I am back 'in the box' with my eating. I am going to get my fitness on. AND, I am going to take some time to meditate a little. I finished Geneen Roth's new book and I am going to give some of her suggestions a try.
I am 36 and have been overweight for most of my life. There are much better things that define me, but till I work on this weight, it is the stinky fart in the room. So, I write this to keep accountable, to find inspiration in others, to rekindle the joy in myself.