Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Felt Like Writing

I have been contemplating writing for a while...  not really worried if people read it or not anymore.  I think I was in this 'must be read for self worth' rut.  So, I kinda disappeared for a while.
I got lost in life... new marriage, new dog, new home, new car, newish job...  a lot of new.

I started working from home full time and had to wrap my arms around not being around people as much, and being around my kitchen 24/7.  When you do not have that water cooler outlet, an extra snack seems far more appealing.

I have had to get used to my husband.  It seems odd to say, being that we have been together for almost 20 years.  It is just different now that we are married.  Mostly different because in my mind there are things husbands and wives are supposed to do...  I have slowly adjusted and come the realization that life isn't really like that.  I am cool with it now.  My husband rocks.

I invited a longtime friend to move in with us.  (No, it isn't some creepy sex thing).  He just needed to get outta dodge, and I said come home.  I don't regret it for a moment.  I think it made me appreciate and love my husband all the more, because he totally supported it.  My friend is in a totally new zone now:  new job, new friends, and lives nearby.

I moved, which meant I switched fitness routines (new gym, new trainer)...  I am still not happy with how it is now.  I really loved what I was doing before.  I feel a bit stuck in big-box gymville...  But, it is what I can afford, and what I am making the best of. 

I got a puppy.  Annie is the sweetest, cutest, most manipulative cuddle junkie I have ever met.  She makes all the other pet owners swoon at the dog park.  She belongs in magazines.  But, for now, she is my work at home co-worker, and friend.  She cuddles me while I type.  She tells me when I need a break and when to walk it off.  I love her.

I also put on some weight..  I was great for the wedding (9-10-11), and then took a pause..  I decided to eat whatever as opposed to my restricted regimen.  As a result, I am now 252lbs....  about 30 lbs  up. This took a full year to gain, but it is still not o.k.  I don't feel good.  My joints hurt because my fitness level has really remained the same, except my joints are taking the pounding..  So, this is where this blog comes in.  I need to get myself refocused and cut the shit.

I have a goal.. I have a wedding to attend on December 16.  That is 7 weeks away.  I would like to drop 15 lbs.  I think if I keep to eating and moving, I have a good shot.  I will write here when I am stressed or when I start to doubt.  Here I go... again...